Unbalanced

Wouldn't change him for the world

I'm feeling a little bit ordinary today. Do you ever have a day when you feel like crying one minute, but feel like punching someone the next? If you haven't, you're a much better person than me and I'm truly glad there are balanced people like you in the world. If you have had a day like mine, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.

Nathan and I have been looking at making some changes, including moving closer to the city, for the past 6 months or so. Unfortunately, things haven't been falling into place, and my usual 'cup half full' attitude has taken a bit of a battering today. Just when we see some light at the end of the tunnel, things change and don't work out the way we had hoped. There just seem to be so many bumps in the road at the moment. We would give anything to be living closer to our older kids, and to be able to give Felix more opportunities to attend early intervention with his little buddies from Down Syndrome SA (we only managed 3 sessions last year because of distance). I have no problem with Felix spending time with children who don't have disabilities (in fact, I encourage it) but, I'm a realist and I know that as he gets older, the gap between his development and other 'typical' kids, is only going to widen so it's important for him to form friendships with kids he'll be able to relate to better as he grows.

Fun with Aaron

Much as I delighted in seeing the smiles Felix brought to people's faces at the supermarket tonight, all I seemed to focus on were the two people who stared at him. I don't know why it bothered me because there were at least six others who spoke to him and told us how cute he was. I think I was having a bit of a 'pity party'. I'm not sorry that Felix looks different because he has Down Syndrome. I don't want anyone's pity or observe their disdain. I just want people to see him the way I do; as a little boy with a gorgeous smile, who likes to help by pulling groceries off the shelf and throwing them into the trolley. I just want people to see Felix the way I see him and, today, it upset me that they don't always.

What's that face?

To cheer myself up, I'm going to post some photos I took of Felix yesterday. He was sitting up on Aaron's bed with him and they were having a great time, wrestling and laughing. Felix was a real joy yesterday. He spent most of the morning playing with the dogs outside while I refurbished an old chest of drawers. It was the first time I had actually seen him put both arms around the dogs and give them big squeezes. Our smallest dog, Envy, realised, with much enthusiasm, that there was a new person in the house who would sit and pat her  (which she loves- her name is very appropriate). She wasn't quite as excited when Felix started covering her with stones, as she lay on her side, but I think she figured that any attention was good attention, so she patiently let him do it.

As for me....tomorrow is another day.